Now I am going to use the most clichéd introduction for this article. Billy Crystal’s character in When Harry Met Sally claims that men and women can never be friends because sex will inevitably get in the way. Since that time (and probably even before that time), men have been asked this question by women. And like the question of “Does this dress make me fat?” any answer is wrong. Even I don’t know the answer to this question despite my twenty-seven years of experience.
So can men and women ever be friends? I am generally not a shallow person so I like to think that the answer is yes. I am not sure if sex is what prevents men and women from becoming friends. But as I am sure that I feel that I can be friends with women, I realize that I only know good-looking women and chose to be in the company of gorgeous women. Am I thinking of sex? No, not really. However, I feel ashamed that I wouldn’t befriend someone who is ugly or plain-looking. I know that my odds of having sex with good-looking and ugly people are about the same (yeah…I know…you are going to say zero percent. Truth hurts!).
I generally feel comfortable around beautiful women and prefer their company, ceteris paribus. Perhaps I am subconsciously thinking about sex. Or I am thinking that if I hang out with beautiful people, I must also be good-looking. But I think that this isn’t the whole truth either. In this regard, women are equally shallow. Women may not mind hanging out with ugly people or people to whom they are not physically attracted. However, women don’t like to be with guys who have no direction and ambition. Perhaps, in their mind, women cannot imagine shacking up with people who have no future.
I am still thinking about this issue and I am not sure. I want to say that I can be friends with women but I don’t have close female friends with whom I had not had some sort of attraction. With some of them, I have grown past the attraction and can see them as one of the boys. And the other ones…I don’t keep in touch with them anymore. Whereas, I am still close to all of my male friends with whom I grew up. Perhaps, this is because the idea of getting naked with my buds is absolute zero and with women, it is like 0.000001% -- about the same odds as winning the lottery. And even when I know the odds, if the jackpot is big enough, I will wait on line for a chance to hit the jackpot.
